Where can I get it?
You can get it in a private clinic
Or in a room, with a bunch of people in it.
You can get it in a spa with lots of la de da.
You can get it in a hospital, it’s now very possible.
It’s a portable medicine, no matter where you roam,
Why, yes! Yes! You can even get it at home!
In cars and planes and slow moving buses
It doesn’t matter where, you just need to trust us.
It ain’t magic and it ain’t a religion,
It’s scientific, so just expand your vision.
Getting poked, it isn’t a joke
So just make sure you go to the right kind of folks.
Don’t get it from a chiropractor or a physical therapist
For criminy sakes, get if from a licensed acupuncturist!
They’re highly trained, with big giant brains.
They love what they do, they’re in it for you.
Afraid you say, of little tiny pins?
Just remember this with the biggest of grins:
It’s a natural way to stay in the game
And to keep your precious body from being in pain.
In closing I must say:
It took a lot of education,
And plenty of thoughtful legislation,
For me to be here, saying to you….
PLEASE do acupuncture, it’s really, really COOL!